Little & Lost
by Iluvff
Summary: Danny comes to the aid of a small child and fights for the right to help her, while his own thoughts swirl with long-ago memories.


**Little & Lost**

©2017 by Lori

The black Mercury screeched to a stop in the fire lane outside the familiar Waikiki apartment building alongside several police cars with their lights flashing in panicked discord. Steve McGarrett bounded out of the driver's side like a lightning bolt and advanced quickly toward the building's entrance. Before he arrived, he was politely blocked by a senior HPD officer.

"Steve, wait! I need to talk to you before you go in!" rushed the words of Charley Huang, a veteran law enforcement officer whom Steve knew well.

Steve couldn't help but be alarmed at Charley's caution but was glad to see someone he trusted who could answer his preeminent question of the moment. "Why? Where's Danno?!"

Charley put up his hands with his palms toward Steve to hold off any further advance or questions. "Danny's inside."

"Is he OK? Dispatch told me he was involved in… something… and to come to his apartment right away." Steve could hardly stand **not** to rush inside and see for himself.

"Steve, he's fine, really," Charley reassured him. " _ **I**_ had dispatch call you."

With his brow still furled in apprehension, McGarrett asked, "Why? What's going on, Charley? What's happened?" By now, Steve was somewhat relieved at the answers he was getting, but simultaneously confused. He knew Charley and knew there must have been good cause for him to have called him out.

Removing his uniform cap to his hand, Charley scratched his head and asked, "Did you hear about the robbery and murder – in broad daylight — of a woman in a downtown parking lot this afternoon?"

Steve had heard, of course, and he nodded impatiently, "Yeah…, and I heard that the suspects were caught shortly afterward—but what's that got to do with this? Was Danno in on the capture?"

Charley verbally hurried on as they stood near the building's entrance. "No, but the victim lived in this building. She was a neighbor of Danny's. We came to notify her next of kin and found Danny at her apartment, sitting with the victim's little girl, waiting for the mother to come home. Of course, she didn't…."

"Why would Danno—of all people—be watching the little girl?" Steve still was having a difficult time understanding Danny's role in this situation.

"It seems the victim was a single mother. I really think he was just being a good neighbor…," the veteran officer suggested, with a shrug of his shoulders and a reassuring look toward the Five-O chief.

Steve's mind wandered just a bit from the conversation with Charley back to a memory from his office earlier in the afternoon. The Five-O team had been in the big office when Danny received a call.

 _ **Steve, mind if I cut out a little early? I need to go and pick up a neighbor of mine. Sorry, but it's kind of important. She needs a ride and….**_

 _ **She does? On your way to pick up a girl, huh? Sure, Danno, sure. I guess we can drop our investigation long enough for your romantic escapades**_ _ **to get a head start on the evening….**_

 _ **No, no. It's not like that at all. It really is a girl, a little girl. Her school called me. I need to pick her up for her mother, who's a friend of mine.**_ _ **It's**_ _ **just a favor….**_

 _ **Sure, sure. Go ahead. I wouldn't want to disappoint the, uh, little girl!**_

Danny had quickly and easily given up defending himself and allowed the team to think whatever they wished and headed out the door. That had been several hours ago.

Charley's voice pulled Steve of his reverie. "I'm sorry we had to call you, but Danny's being difficult—really difficult! No one wants to cross a superior officer, so I decided that you were the only one who could handle him."

Steve was surprised. _'Difficult'_ was not a word that was often used to describe the easy-going, affable, popular Dan Williams. "Danno? Difficult? About what?"

Just as Charley opened his mouth to respond to the questions, sharp screams from inside the building pierced the night air and lingered on as a series of wailing cries.

Instinctively, Steve and Charley dashed toward the entrance and up the stairs toward the sound of the howling sobs. Steve's heart beat ever faster as following the sounds drew them inevitably closer to Danno's apartment, but not quite—they were coming from the apartment next door.

As the two reached the apartment, Steve noticed a plethora of HPD officers outside of the doorway, along with several subdued plain clothed officials with ID badges inside, many of whom he did not recognize.

* * *

" _My mommy and daddy are supposed to pick me up."_

* * *

Easing himself into the strange apartment, he saw the source of the terrifying cries was the aforementioned little girl, sitting half on a sofa and half held by Dan Williams, who was himself sitting on the edge of the coffee table facing her. She thrashed violently against Danny's strong athletic body, which held steadfast against the strikes of the child expressing her rage and grief.

An ID-badged woman took notice of Steve and his confused look. She whispered to him in low, pitiful tones, "He just told her her mother is dead."

Over the next minutes, the sobs and screams dissolved into whimpers as Danny held the little girl with his arms wrapped strongly around her small 6-year-old body. He enveloped her all around protectively, letting no one else even try to soothe her or speak to her. Those in the room could tell that he was whispering words of comfort to her but so softly no one could make out the words heard only by the two of them.

* * *

" _No, no, no! Noooooooooooooooooooooooo!"_

" _We told you—your parents aren't coming home. We're so sorry. A war has started, and they were killed in the bombing."_

* * *

In his preoccupation with the girl's pain and with his back to the apartment door, Danny pretty much ignored the group of people who occupied the small living room. In particular he never saw the rushed arrival of his boss and friend, Steve McGarrett, who now silently observed the heart-wrenching scene.

"Danny?" The girl's voice was small and halting, thick with tears.

"What is it, honey?" Danny's voice was sad but strong, his manner gentle and reassuring.

"I thought policemen were supposed to save us from robbers and bad people. Why weren't there any policemen to help my mommy?"

Danny's head tilted slightly in pained reaction to the jarring question. Steve and the other officers nearby heard the little girl's query, too, and felt the sting of innocent accusation.

Danny thought a few moments and took a deep breath, wondering just how to justify his profession's inadequacy in this very specific incident. "Well, Carrie, there aren't enough policemen for everyone to have one with them all the time. Things sometimes happen when policemen aren't nearby to help."

"But you're a policeman, Danny. You couldn't be with my mommy to help her?" The child's bright blue eyes were wet with sorrow and wide with confusion.

Feeling his own eyes tearing up but also suddenly feeling all other eyes were on him, Danny visibly shook, and shook off the threat of losing emotional control over the child's grief. His voice strained as he explained, "Honey, if I could have been there, I would have done whatever I needed to do to protect your mommy. But I was at work helping other people who needed me. Do you understand?" _Please understand._

Without saying anything, Carrie shivered and buried herself a little deeper into Danny's hold, as he hugged her tighter.

Suddenly, she pulled away, just a little. "Danny, can you keep the robbers from getting me, too? What if one comes here tonight when I'm asleep?" Carrie started to shake more noticeably. She wrung her hands, and her hard crying started anew.

* * *

" _I'm scared! Are the men in the planes with the red spots going to come back and kill me, too?"_

* * *

"No, no, no, Carrie. You don't have to worry about that," trying to give necessary credence to the girl's fears, yet reassuring her just the same of the unlikelihood of that happening.

"Why not? Somebody killed my mommy, and they might kill me, too," she practically screamed. "Danny, can you stay with me? You're a policeman, and I'm scared."

He couldn't answer with anything other than, "Of course, honey, I'll stay with you," as he touched her long dark hair in comforting caresses and she continued to cry.

Having overheard the poignant discussion, the ID-badged woman who had spoken to Steve earlier leaned forward over Danny's shoulder and spoke gently but firmly, "Carrie, honey, I told you—you're not going to be able to stay here tonight. And Mr. Williams has lots of people to protect—he can't stay with you all the time. But I have a very nice family who wants you to come and stay with them. They'll take good care of you."

In response, Dan Williams suddenly grabbed Carrie to envelope her more thoroughly as she draped her arms around his neck. He stood up from where he had been perched sitting on the coffee table and spun his body around angrily toward the woman. "And _**I said**_ she's not going anywhere! Now **back off**!" The exclamation was not loud but was a tightly controlled burst of venom toward the Child Protective Services representative, who staggered backward in alarm, practically falling onto the stalwart figure of Steve McGarrett.

Danny's eyes followed her backward stumble away from him—and toward Steve—causing the head of Five-O to come into Danny's full view. Surprised, he spoke more quietly, "Steve? What are you doing here?"

As Carrie glanced toward Steve and dug her fingers deeply into the back of Danny's neck, the CPS representative, Mrs. Tolbert, regained her composure and interrupted, "Mr. Williams, as I said before, we need to take her to a temporary foster family who can care for her until a suitable guardian is found."

"I don't wanna go!" plead little Carrie to anyone who could hear. "I want to stay with Danny! Danny, I'm scared! I want my mommy!" Danny cupped his hand around the back of her head in sympathy, looked her in the eyes and gave her a reassuring smile.

Quietly, Mrs. Tolbert urged Danny. "Mr. Williams, you're only making this harder for her. She obviously thinks a lot of you. Your cooperation and encouragement would go a long way toward settling her in with her foster family."

To Mrs. Tolbert, Danny gave an icy stare and pursed his lips deliberately in a calm but severe, drawn-out, response, " **No**."

* * *

" _Don't cry. You can't stay here. You have to go live with somebody else now…."_

* * *

Like a heavy anchor dropping into the ocean depths, Steve McGarrett heard the finality in the tone Danny used and knew the earnest lady from CPS would get no where with him. He could easily read the huge emotional reaction Danno was having—although he didn't quite understand the root of it—and realized he did indeed need to be here to diffuse the volatile situation.

"Excuse me, Ma'am, may I have a moment with Mr. Williams, please?" Steve asked Mrs. Tolbert. He eyed Danno sternly to let him know that, no matter how politely he worded it, it wasn't a request.

"Gladly," she replied. She instinctively reached out to take the little girl into her arms—and out of Danny's. "I'll just take little Carrie for a while…."

"Nooooooooo!" Carrie screamed. Danny held on tight to her, preventing Mrs. Tolbert's arms from fully grasping the girl.

" **Stop**!" Danny ordered the woman loudly, and she fearfully stepped backward. Adrenaline rushed upward through his body, as if he were preparing himself for a literal fight. Then, glancing at Steve, he took another deep breath to remind himself that this situation did not require a physical response, no matter how cornered he felt.

Knowing him well, Steve McGarrett could see the heat rising in his friend's demeanor and how he was visibly struggling to control himself.

Aware Steve was watching him with concern, Danny compromised. He calmed somewhat and offered, "Look, the three of us can go back to Carrie's room. You can sit with her there while I talk to Steve. That's the only way!"

Raising his eyebrows in alarm at Danno's demands, Steve looked to Mrs. Tolbert, and they both nodded their approval. Steve noticed as Danny looked at both of them warily, as if they were the enemy.

The little girl in question was apparently amply cared for in her home, with a comfortable pink room and wall-to-wall dolls and toys. But little Carrie wasn't seeing any of it right now as she lay softly crying on her bed, with Mrs. Tolbert sitting beside her rubbing her back gently to comfort her.

It had taken Danny several minutes and a lot of soothing to get her to let go of him long enough for him to talk to Steve. Now, he stood together with Steve just out in the hall beyond her room, within eyesight of Carrie and Mrs. Tolbert.

When Steve McGarrett finally had Dan Williams' attention, along with a little privacy, compassion and sympathy mixed too easily with accusation and confusion. "Danno, are you all right? What's going on here? I understand this child's mother was murdered, HPD caught the killers, and that Child Protective Services is trying to get her set up with a foster family. Now I know she was your neighbor, but why are you involved—to this extent—and why on earth are you blocking the CPS efforts?"

Danny took a deep breath as his explanation tumbled out quickly. "Look, Steve, I've known Carrie all her life. She's lost her mother, she's frightened, and she has nobody else. She trusts me, and I'm not going to let her down!"

Putting his left hand on his friend's shoulder, Steve said with as much understanding as the normally no-nonsense detective could generate, "You don't have a choice, Danno. You can't take responsibility for this little girl—it's, it's not… _appropriate_ ," he said carefully.

Steve's last words bore into Danny. He shook himself out of Steve's light hold on his shoulder and seemingly withdrew into deep, cavernous thought until finally he spoke again. "You're worried about Five-O, aren't you? Our reputation…."

Shaking his head, McGarrett defended himself. "That's not what I was thinking…."

Talking animatedly with his hands, Danny returned with resolution. "Steve, this has nothing to do with Five-O. It's personal. I'm an ordinary citizen in this." He gathered his courage to further challenge his boss. "You can't order me to give her up."

"I don't have to! She was never yours to have in the first place, Danno!" Steve stared at Danno, wondering where this devotion to the child was coming from. This was more than pity or duty to a neighbor. Trying hard to keep the conversation going, he added, "Besides, it's also a police matter, an official matter, and you know very well that we cooperate with our fellow agencies. And, you know that how you conduct yourself _on_ or _off_ the clock reflects on Five-O."

Exasperation was taking hold deeply in Five-O's second-in-command. "I know, I know! But Steve, I can't just abandon her. She needs to know… someone still loves her… and understands."

Steve moved to hang his fingers on the edges of his pants pockets as he patiently asked, "Danno, what was this woman to you? More than just a neighbor?"

Danny tiredly leaned his head against the door frame and looked into the bedroom at Carrie being comforted by Mrs. Tolbert. "Kimberlee was a friend." He looked solemn as he continued, "You know, no matter how much we deal with death in this job, it doesn't sting any less when it's someone you know, someone you care about."

McGarrett couldn't help but agree with a nod of his head. "What about the little girl?"

"Carrie? She's special, now more than ever."

"Special? Why?"

Danny didn't answer, and Steve pondered the lack of an answer for a few moments. He looked over at the quiet little girl, with her long bouncy dark hair flowing down over her shoulders, messy now from the tribulations of the last few hours. Looking back at Danno, he noticed he had taken on a distant look while also looking over at Carrie, so he prompted him for more information—perhaps more than he would want. "Danno, you know this… you can't take care of Carrie because you're not her father…. Are you?"

With that question hanging in the air, Danny lifted himself out of his depth of thought and looked up at Steve. "Hey, I've got an idea. Sam and Eileen Parker are foster parents. They've taken care of a lot of kids over the years, and they're friends of mine. Maybe if CPS could assign them to take care of Carrie, then they would let me stay—maybe on their sofa—at least for tonight. Wouldn't that work? Carrie and I would both feel better, and CPS could be satisfied."

Distracted and intrigued by the suggestion, Steve admitted, "It could work, but… you didn't answer my question."

Danny looked away from Steve toward Carrie, then entered her room to talk to Mrs. Tolbert.

* * *

" _I don't want to spend the night here. I want to go home!"_

* * *

That night, still clothed in his dress shirt and suit pants and stretched out on the Parkers' sofa, Dan Williams barely slept. He dozed but woke up to look at his watch at least every hour. Finally, at about 5:00 am, he gave up the pretense of trying to sleep.

He checked on little Carrie, who was thankfully sound asleep in a bed in the children's room of the Parkers' house. She, too, had not slept well until exhaustion claimed her little body well after 2:00 am.

Danny saw an opportunity to get over to his apartment and grab a hot shower, so he left quietly. He took the time, though, to leave the Parkers a note that he would be back soon and to call him if they needed him before then.

Reaching his apartment, he called Steve, knowing he would already be up. Steve suggested they meet somewhere for a quick breakfast.

With coffee, malasadas, and bountiful fruit at their restaurant table, Steve encouraged Danny to eat since he doubted he had taken the time to bother since early yesterday. Danny seemed anxious and in a hurry. Looking at the dark bags under Danny's bleary eyes, Steve questioned, "Did you get any sleep?"

"A little." Danny was not really interested in eating much of anything or talking about how much sleep he had not gotten. He needed to down a cup of caffeine, to apologize for last evening, to get some time off, and go back to the Parkers to be with Carrie, in that order.

With those objectives in mind, he started in, "Listen, Steve. I'm sorry you got dragged into the situation with Carrie and Kimberlee last night. I don't know why Charley felt he had to call you. That Mrs. Tolbert was just going to swoop in and take Carrie to some strange place where she didn't know a soul and expect her to be OK, just after she found out her mother was dead! It wasn't right!" He paused to run his hand nervously over his curly hair as he impatiently jumped to his next thought. "Even if I was being unreasonable, it's not your responsibility to keep me straight. I don't need a keeper," he insisted.

Steve could tell that Danny was acting defensive, atypically curt, and just a little manic. He could easily blame the lack of sleep and distress over his friend's murder and Carrie's grief. Overlooking it for now, he tried to keep the discussion low-key but realistic. Narrowing his eyes to accent his words, Steve spoke, "Danno, you _were_ _not_ being cooperative last night. It put the HPD officers in an uncomfortable position." Leaning back and taking a deep breath, Steve added, "But, I understand—up to a point."

Picking up on the hint of a compassionate tone, Danny hurried on to his next objective. "I appreciate that. Steve, I need to take some time off to help Carrie…."

* * *

" _Do you remember your parents talking about your Aunt Clara? You're going to go live with her now."_

* * *

Interrupting his anxious friend, Steve was quick to question his request, "Why is it your responsibility to help the girl, Danno? We have an entire agency staffed to place children in these situations. CPS will…."

Barely controlling his irritation, "Mrs. Tolbert and CPS _do not_ KNOW her! Yes, they can put a roof over her head and appoint responsible adults who will feed and clothe her, but they cannot comfort her like I can. They cannot know the loss she feels like I can!"

Leaning across the table with concern and putting up a hand to slow Danny's uncharacteristic stream of consciousness rambling, Steve cautioned, "Slow down, Danno. Easy."

Danny leaned back and let a slow breath out of his pursed lips, closed his eyes, and rubbed his forehead. "Sorry, Steve."

"This still doesn't make sense to me, Danno. Why does it have to be YOU?"

"I've known Carrie since she was a baby. She has just lost the person who loved her more than anything in a violent, sudden attack."

Unexpectedly for both of them, Danny's thinking jumped to the horrendous crime. Putting his hand out to Steve to get his attention, he plunged on, "What about the killers, Steve? What do you know about them? Is the case solid? Are they likely to get bail?"

McGarrett quickly moved to quell what he was afraid might be another avenue toward which Danny could turn his unpredictable temper in this matter. "I don't have the answers to all of those questions, but I trust that HPD has done its job in their murder investigation. It's not our case, Danno," he ended.

Then using his index finger to point directly at his friend, Steve intoned seriously, "Now, listen to me, Danno! As your commanding officer, I _order you_ not to go near those two suspects or that investigation! This is too personal for you, and I'm afraid of what you'll do if you get your hands on them! Promise me, Danno!"

Opening his eyes wide upon hearing the absolute order from McGarrett, Danny acquiesced. "I promise, Steve."

"Good." Steve relaxed marginally then continued, "I will have Kono check with HPD on the case and make sure there aren't any loopholes. I think, though, that the suspects are two-bit druggies who just got in too deep. I don't expect any high-priced attorneys getting them out on bail."

"Druggies," Danny repeated sullenly. "Druggies who took a mother's life for no good reason and left Carrie alone."

"Well, she's not really alone. For some reason that escapes me, Danno, she seems to have you quite tightly wrapped around her little fingers." Steve probed his officer for answers. "Why is that?"

Danny heard Steve but suddenly felt so very tired at the thought of all the reasons he needed to help Carrie.

At the same time, he felt very appreciative of the support he was receiving from his boss and friend. Ordinarily at this time of the morning, Steve should be in the midst of meetings and case briefings and ongoing investigations. Instead, he sat and listened to Danny's rambling and tried to understand.

On the troubling side, Danny could see that Steve was worried by his strange behaviors of the last half day or so—the kind of worry he usually saw as Steve hovered near his bedside after an injury or illness—the wondering about whether he would be OK.

* * *

" _Say good-bye to your old room. Someone else will buy this house and maybe they will have a little boy, too, who can live there and be so happy…."_

* * *

"Danno? Danno?" Steve snapped his fingers in front of Danny's face to bring him out of his deep reverie. Danny jumped a bit as he blinked hard and focused on Steve. Steve held onto his friend's arms and asked, "Danno, are you all right? Danno?"

In reality, Danny was a little worried about himself. He felt he was coming unhinged. The memories would not abate.

"Yeah, yeah, I'm fine," as he gently pushed Steve's arms away. "Just tired."

Coming around more and more, under the watchful gaze of Steve McGarrett, Danny drank some coffee and tried to look more alert and in control. He decided to allay some of Steve's worries, and maybe his own.

"Steve, I want to get back to see how Carrie is doing. I know I haven't answered all of your questions, but I can tell you that Kimberlee had a sister on the mainland. I talked to her last night. As soon as she can get here, she will take Carrie to live with her. So, you see, I am willing to give her up—to the right person."

* * *

 _"Aunt Clara, it's cold where you live, right? Not warm like here…."_

* * *

"Good, good," Steve responded sincerely, silently relieved that Danny was not considering keeping Carrie himself indefinitely. The scenario begged the intriguing question, though, and he carefully eyed Danny for a reaction. "What about Carrie's father?"

"Steve," Danny finally confessed, "in all honesty, I have never known who Carrie's father is, but it isn't me. Kimberlee and I were only friends. I never asked her about Carrie's father, and she never mentioned him." Looking contrite, Danny continued, "I'm sorry I mislead you last night. I was hopeful that if someone thought I was her father, I might have a better chance of staying with her."

Steve nodded in acceptance and breathed a sign of relief. "I'm certainly glad the air is clear about that, Danno. I can't say I quite understand your devotion to the little girl, but I appreciate it." He paused for some moments, then said, "Take the rest of the week off, Danno, and help her. Give Kono a call, though, to let him know what he needs to do to cover for you until you get back. Just stay in close touch, OK? I've been worried about you."

Smiling the first genuine smile Steve had seen all day, Danny stood up slowly and tiredly but in more control of himself than when he had entered the restaurant. The talk with Steve had done him good. "Thank you, Steve."

* * *

" _Danny, you look frozen. Let me help you with your coat and hat. Did you have fun playing outside, dear?"_

" _No, Aunt Clara. I hate snow."_

* * *

 **EPILOGUE**

Some days later, Danny stood at the airport window as he watched the airplane with Carrie and her aunt taxi away from the gate. It moved as if in slow motion, if only to Danny.

Finally, he turned around to walk away, looked up and saw Steve McGarrett standing, watching him. "What are you doing here, Steve? Checking to make sure I'm coming back to work? I'm on my way."

"Carrie and her aunt on their way back to the mainland now, Danno?" Steve said as they approached each other in the terminal.

"Yes, the plane is leaving on time, as scheduled." Danny turned around to look again through the window wistfully. "It was harder to say good-bye than I thought. Carrie's in good hands, although she may not know it yet."

Steve nodded and agreed. "So, are you going to be okay now? That little girl meant a lot to you, didn't she?"

"Yes, she did, but as much as anything, I just felt she needed me. I felt I could understand when no one else could, or would." Danny said as he and Steve began walking through the concourse.

Steve thought about what Danny said, as they walked along in silence.

As they neared the exit, Steve broke the silence with a question. "Danno, tell me something. Why do you hate snow?"

 **PAU**

 _Author's Note: The idea that Danny Williams' parents were killed in the bombing at Pearl Harbor and eventually went to live with his Aunt Clara on the mainland is not original to me. It is a common theme in this show's fan fiction, so it is fanon, not canon. I would gladly give credit to whomever originated the idea, but I do not know who that is! The earliest fan fiction in which I have seen it mentioned is in Gina Martin's and Barb Huff's stories posted on their SoloSojourn website. -Lori_


End file.
